I realise there are infinite number of things or people we will compare ourselves with. The list is fathomless and  comparing yourself is a strong emotion that resonates with every individual regardless of age or race.

And even if you do not want to, you seldom find that you are drawn towards comparing or competing with someone else because that in itself is a strong human emotion and when you start comparing you find there is no end to it especially if you see your mates or people on social media (which by the way mostly depicts false impression)  doing something exciting and you are yet to achieve that, you are drawn to comparing.

You need to understand that comparing yourself only rubs you off your happiness- Your own happiness and your precious time. Rather than comparing, why not find something worthwhile to do in order to develop yourself.

Everyone has a different route they go through in life as well as different gifts. The fact that someone got there before you doesn’t make you a failure. You are only different and will get there eventually, you might just take a longer route and that’s ok.

Comparison also brings about resentment. You find yourself resenting the other person and the most silly thing is, this person is not aware of what’s going on in your world. They are busy making themselves better.

Also, comparison makes you channel your energy on the wrong thing because you focus on something else rather than working on yourself.  I know it can be frustrating when you hope to attain a certain level in life but are unable to because of one situation or another but find others achieving the same thing- I understand but remember I mentioned earlier, we all have different routes. Some people might get there before others but in the end, you will get there even if you take the longer route. It is ok, just keep pushing and work harder.

Another thing to remember is, no one gets a gold medal for owning the first house or getting married first or giving birth first so enjoy the process whilst you are trying to be the best version of yourself and do not let the spirit of comparison dwell in you because it brings about negative emotions and I believe you want to live  healthy lives.

In this post, I hope to encourage you going through a difficult time and to remind you that you are not alone in this journey. Maybe you feel disappointed at not having achieved the things you had hoped to achieve this year. Do not feel discouraged.

I was practically in the same position as you a few weeks back and then I turned my worries into praise (hence the praise Challange) and I have seen tremendous changes happen in my life and I encourage you to do same.

Although tonight marks the end of the challenge, that doesn’t translate that I will stop praising. On the contrary, I will keep praising God regardless of the situation but this challenge was just to refrain from asking and worshipping him solely.

I hope you end the year on a positive note regardless of the hurdles you’ve encountered.

Do not give up.

 

 

 

Faith, Inspiration, Fire, Earthquake, Storm, Elijah, Hearing from God, Making decisions

He was not in the Fire

Yesterday morning while in the bathroom I had a wow moment. As fate would have it, later in the evening I was having a conversation with my mum and sister centred around the happenings of the morning then all of a sudden, the thoughts gradually became clearer and were now making so much sense to me.

Here I was in the morning brushing my teeth and the thought of Elijah in the Bible dropped in my mind. The bible said he was instructed by God to go to the mountains and God will pass by. (1 Kings 19:11). It was later recorded that there was a powerful wind, thereafter an earthquake, and after the earthquake, a fire but God was not in any of these events. I was trying to make sense of this when a question came to mind It went something like ‘ you know we make decisions and think God is in it right?” and I was like WOW, so true!!.
Immediately thoughts began to form in my mind.

Whilst going through that motion, I was reminded of times I, like many other Christians made decisions and went ahead with our plans in hope that Christ was involved only to realise he wasn’t.

As I was sharing with my family, I said to them: “ the best thing before making decisions or venture into a life-changing activity is to desire and seek Gods will in that situation”. Then came the question “how do I know it is not Gods will for me especially after I prayed about it and told God to give it to me?”.

My response to that was “you told God to give it to you but what if it wasn’t part of his plan for you to have it.?”. The difference here is, we are telling God what we want rather than asking what he wants us to do in the situation.

Although that’s a tough question and I probably didn’t give the best response but I know there are times we get into relationships, careers or make a life-changing decision after praying and asking. And because it came to us, we think God was involved. Sometimes he chose to go quiet and we mistake his quietness as a response

{p.s. This isn’t to say people don’t hear from God because, in fact, most people hear God and very clearly too. For these people, this comes with growth, knowledge of God and a relationship with him.}

So back to the question: how do I know God’s will? The truth is, I know God wishes for his children to prosper and be in good health and I myself struggle to comprehend what God is asking me to do at some point in my life. Other times it’s very clear but in moments when I hear nothing, when I am clueless, it’s in those moments I plead for him to guide me in making the right decisions. I also take it further by pleading with him to walk with me so I do not go out of his will.

Another thing I say to him is for him not to take me where his presence isn’t. Once that’s said, I relax and let him have his way.

To non-Christian, this might be difficult to comprehend and that’s fine. However, for those who have made decisions but didn’t hear from God and went ahead in hope that God was there think of Elijah and ask for God’s will.

“11 The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.”

Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind, there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.” 1 Kings 19:11-12

Obviously, I do not mean it in the literal word as ‘me’ walking on water. But this phrase ‘Walking on water’ is one that’s been on my mind since the 10th of September and each day I am inspired to write something about it. And I know I’ve been away for a while- from social media and everything ‘online’. The time off was a much-needed space for me to reflect and most importantly work on myself. I never forgot about you though but this ‘me time’ was everything I needed and still need. Hopefully, I get to go in-depth in sharing my story on what’s happened and still happening to inspire you. So since I’ve been away let me start by saying …hey lovelies, it’s good to have you back (insert smiley face).

I have been inspired to share my thoughts on walking on water based on the encounters I had several months back. And although this phrase brings to mind the story of Jesus walking on water it, also, speaks volume to my personal journey these past months. I was listening to Mali Music ‘Walk on water’ and instantly I realised how the past months have been for me. It felt as though I have been walking on water, almost drowning.

This phrase ‘walking on water’ speaks particularly to me about life’s struggles. How we try to cope with the impossible or what seems impossible. It’s like being thrown into the ocean deep knowing fully well you are unable to swim and when thrown in, you struggle to breath, you need to survive. You fight to come out so you find a way of lifting yourself; your head a little higher, you’re happy because you catch your breath but then you find yourself going deeper and deeper again and you wonder “is this the end?” Now that’s how life can be for some people but if you are lucky, you swim out of it and come to land or you get recused by the lifeguard but sadly not everyone makes it to land.

The past months have been like that for me, one of a roller coaster, struggling to swim out of the ocean I was thrown in, and how like Peter in the Bible, I kept looking up to God to save me from drowning, and other times been so afraid that I look at the sea and I thought I was sinking, and somehow like Peter I was led back to the boat. In that moment, I literally saw God manifest himself in the most amazing way possible.

I mean sometimes God is so full of humour and he makes me laugh at how he turns everything out in one’s favour only if you trust him. So particularly for me, its been months of learning, reflecting, waiting on God and holding on to his words.

Throughout this process, I have learnt to wait on the lord and to trust his timing. I now understand that he is never too late or too early he is simply on time and whilst he is working, I am learning to be Still and just Wait.

The difficulty with all of these is, it isn’t easy to wait on someone or something when everything around you looks like it’s about to crash on you and if you do not act fast, you will crumble with it but hey I’m learning to ‘WAIT’ and ‘TRUST’ Gods timing. I will say trusting and waiting is the most difficult part for me as I am generally not a patient person but I am learning. slowly, taking baby steps.

In conclusion, although it’s been months of challenges, it has toughened and strengthened my faith and I am slowly learning not to get obsessed over how things will get resolved but trust Gods timing.

Valentine, Embrace your Singlehood, Singlehood, Restaurant, Celebrate, Family, Friends, HangoutI hear people express disappointment at spending Valentines day alone. They make comments like ‘hmm it’s Valentines day tomorrow and here I am single’ as if being single is a shame on its own.

This got me thinking about the initial purpose of valentines day, was it a day set aside for lovers as is the norm or is it a time to show love to people around including the beggar at the roadside?

Notwithstanding because of its connotation, people tend to spend Valentine’s day with their other half which is absolutely fine.
So because of what it is popularly known for, a lot of single people get downcast when they’ve got no one to spend this day with.
Here are a couple of suggestions you could employ to make your valentines day worthwhile if you haven’t got a date or someone special to spend it with. It also applies to those in a relationship.

1: Spend time with families and friends. You can either cook a nice dinner and invite them over or, you could all go out for a meal.Valentine, Embrace your Singlehood, Singlehood, Restaurant, Celebrate, Family, Friends, Hangout

A few years back (2016), I had an amazing time with my girlfriend. After a long day at work, I came down to a different city to hang out with her as I haven’t seen her in a while. I wasn’t single but I thought I do something out of the ordinary which was visiting a friend on Valentine’s day. It was such an amazing time together as we got to catch up on what’s been happening with each other. And the highlight of it all was the nice food we were served at the restaurant.

Valentine, Embrace your Singlehood, Singlehood, Restaurant, Celebrate, Family, Friends, Hangout

2. So if the above doesn’t sound good to you as a single person, why not get your friends who are also single so you all can celebrate your ‘singlehood’. Being single can be beautiful in its own way so do not feel dejected when you see other’s put up pictures with their other half. Rather than feeling sad, do something special on this day, celebrate yourself, celebrate your being single and enjoy each moment.
I hope you enjoy your day.

Happy Val x

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